This is Nicole Thiessen. Of course, this was taken YEARS before she wrote the entry here on chapter 4! She titled the entry, which is kind of cool, and you'll see why as you read on. Enjoy!
The media has always been my number one complaint in regards to children growing up too fast, which is covered in Elkind’s chapter 4. It was interesting to me how our exposure to these hurried objects of the media has increased over the years, but are not the sole reason for the fast track growing up.
The invention of the television was a blessing and a curse all wrapped up into one big electrical box. While it does provide informative information and entertainment beyond belief, is all of that appropriate for a child to have unlimited access to? And more importantly, is the content too mature for their developing minds?
The television shows discussed in the book were at opposite ends of the spectrum, which I see as a lose-lose situation for kids. Parents watched the adorable genius “Doogie Howser, M.D.,” and thought, “Why can't my kid be like that?” I know just as well as the next person that a fourteen-year-old could not actually be a licensed physician, but talk about pressure. The thought of that little Einstein makes me feel less than adequate. And I'm an adult who fully understands that it is not real!! I cannot even imagine how a fourteen-year-old must feel at the thought of not being able to remove the ruptured appendix of his neighbor whose parents are out of town, and in order to do so, must go against hospital policy. Seriously, wow.
Then there are the slightly more realistic issues of the kids on Dawson's Creek. These creek kids have to deal with issues that teens really do face in this day and age: drugs, violence, crime and sex. Even though these topics are more realistic than a fourteen-year-old doctor, does that mean that a nine-year-old should be watching? I love the term Elkind uses to describe this fantasy versus reality world we are in, which is “pseudo-sophistication.” All this means is that children today obtain more information than is understood. I don't know how many times I have rambled on about something like I understood it inside and out, when I really had no clue what in the world was going on. The point is not that I know what I'm talking about, but that I sound like I do. If children take in information and sound like they know what they are talking about, who's to say the adults in their life won't be pushed to hurry them even more than they already are? And as a future teacher, I hope that I will be able to recognize the difference between knowing and understanding.
Another form of media Elkind mentions is music. I know personally how effective music can be. I highly doubt that I am the only person in the world who has searched like a mad woman to find the perfect song to fit my current mood. A few years back, I went through what I will call a bad break up (which is an understatement to say the least), and nothing made me happier than hearing Carrie Underwood tear into some loser's truck. Now obviously I am not going to run out and massacre someone’s car, although the thought has been strong, because I have learned the rules of behavior to be a part of society. While I have learned this guidance from my parents, there are children who are not as fortunate. Again there is this reoccurring issue of fantasy versus reality. How many tragedies have occurred when a child shows up at school with a gun because Marilyn Manson told him to in one of his songs? It's amazing to me how, years ago, I would get angry at statements like these, and say how dumb that they are blaming their actions on a song. After taking many child development courses and delving into a child's mind and the power of persuasion, I now see how something that seemed so absurd at one time is more than possible.
Going back to pseudo-sophistication, there is an example given that stuck with me the entire chapter, and I think is a prime example of being hurried along. Elkind explained, "A young girl, made-up and dressed in a seductive outfit, still feels and thinks of herself as a young girl, not as a young woman" (p. 85). Did anyone else's mind go there? “Little Miss Perfect” and “Toddlers & Tiaras.” I shamelessly admit that I have seen many an episode, and it's amazing that no matter how much money is spent on hiring pageant coaches, costumes, make-up artists and hairstylists, at the end of the day, those little girls are five years old. And just like with any five-year-old, when all is said and done, all they want is their mommy.
I'm assuming it is very obvious that I feel very strongly about the media's influence on how children are raised. With all the new TV shows and DVDs out there, the parent role is fading out. It is becoming easier and easier to say, “Sit down and watch this,” instead of having that one-on-one time that is so crucial for children of all ages. I think it is safe to say that no matter how old we get, and how grown up we think we are, we all wish for just a little bit of innocence. I am not afraid to admit that sometimes at the end of the day, when the make-up is washed off, jammies are on and hair is in a ponytail, I just want my mommy.
Nicole, I really truly loved everything you had to say. I kept nodding my head in agreement, thinking how if I tried to say the same thing it would never come out as clear as you have stated it.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that media (television and movies in particular) are taking over a lot of the parental roles. Many parents will put their children in front of the television so that they can get things done around the house. Some parents even sit down to watch television with their families and expect the television shows to have the information needed in order to raise perfectly healthy, educated children. I know a lot of parents that get angry when a certain show did or did not bring up a topic of importance to them. This is frustrating to me, because as a parent they should be responsible for the raising of their children, teaching them their morals and values, not relying on the television to do this for them.
The mention of "Little Miss Perfect" made me blush a little, as I watch this show often at the gym. I try to say that I only watch it because it is on the huge television set in front of me, however I have started to see some horrifying effects. This is what happened: I was watching the "Little Miss Perfect" show and I was thinking about my soon to be baby. I was imagining being one of those moms. I even went as far as to text my husband and ask him if he thought our little girl should be in beauty contests! A few days later I was thinking about this and I was horrified at myself. Watching this show I started thinking of my tiny unborn baby in terms of everything Elkind would stand against. I was already hurrying my baby, as she is not even here yet, and I was making plans of what she will be like. Fortunately, I can easily see the error in my thinking, and I will gladly support my children in all that makes them a uniquely individual. It is unfortunate to think that I, being a child development major, and an educated adult fell into the media's trap so easily.
Perhaps I would be better off running outside, instead of in front of gigantic televisions at the gym?
Hi, Nicole
ReplyDeleteAs I read your blog it was amazing how connected I felt to everything you had to say. I totally agree on all the aspects you covered. The topic that most interested me was how everything these days is based on media and it is intervening with parents’ roles. The media does not understand how much impact they have on society and especially on our youngest members of society (children). There have been times when even I, as a young adult, have had a connection to the media that has had an impact on me as well. I totally agreed with on the section where, you talked about the song that illustrated everything you were feeling with that bad break-up. There have been occasions in the past, when I have felt down, and play songs over and over just because they relate to my emotions in that specific moment. Elkind states an important point: that music is probably the most influential of the media, due to all these young teens listening to music all day long. Again I can relate to this if I am doing homework, cleaning, or driving, the one thing playing is music. So what can we do to get rid of the influence music has on society? Something we need to look into in the future……
Nicole, first of all, great title!
ReplyDeleteThe part in this chapter about the media and its influence also caught my attention. I agree with your points of view. Television has been both a plus and a negative in our society. Sometimes parents are so absorbed with their jobs that they let the television do their work; television turns into their children’s babysitters. A lot of the times parents would rather finish their workload at home than spend quality time with their children. What are the children at home supposed to do when their parents have so much work to do? Well, almost always they sit and watch television. I mean, why wouldn’t they? They find all kinds of programs that are interesting on TV. Whether it’s cartoons, Hannah Montana, or MTV Cribs. It’s really easy to use, it requires no physical activity, it’s entertaining, and it’s there for them.
I also agree with your point of view about music. Goodness gracious! There are some songs that have horrible messages about guns, being pimps, having money, going to clubs, getting drunk, etc. What messages are the artists really sending to children? They are basically telling them that it is okay to party all night, go to a club, and get all drunk. Is that what we should really be teaching them? I really don’t think so. And it is even scarier when, like you mentioned, they show up at school with a gun as a result of what they heard on a song! It is so easy for children to access any type of music now-a-days. Are parents adequately prepared to stop their children from accessing this type of music? My guess is that they are not because it is everywhere. Unfortunately parents cannot keep their children in a bubble so that they are not exposed ….. so, who are we to blame? The children? The artists? The people of the music industry? Parents? It is a very tough situation to be in as a parent when it comes to the media and trying to regulate it.
-Veronica Lua
Aglaed Garcia
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Nicole, children are influence by the media in a negative way. The music that children hear can influence them physically, psychologically, and even emotionally. For instance, a 12 year old girl can be influence by negative music video that talks about sex and drugs. The 12 year old girl might feel that she is old enough to experience sex. She might think that having sex with an older boy is something cool and acceptable. Music videos can also influence the girl in the way she dresses. The teenage girl might want to dress very provocative, which is very inappropriate. She may think that if she looks like the girls in the music video, she will gain popularity and respect from her peers and not to mention the attention from boys. Negative music pressures children to grow faster. It’s very shocking, how music can manipulate our children today.
I am in total agreement with you Nicole. The media is also a huge gripe of mine. I was appalled last week as I watched an episode of Nightline. A six year old girl was interviewed and she said that she wants to be a Victoria’s Secret model when she grows up. I don’t know about all of you, but I find that very disturbing. I think that goes to show just how big of an affect that the media has on children. When I was six years old I didn’t even know what a bra and underwear model was, my dream was to grow up to be a ballerina.
ReplyDeleteI also think there is nothing worse than when I walk into a movie theater and I see a bunch of children in there. For a moment I worry and think that I walked into the wrong one, but I didn’t. I am disgusted to see that people actually brought their children to see the R rated movie I am about to watch. I really can’t understand the mindset behind bringing a child to see a movie that has profanity, nudity, and adult themes that children just could not understand.
I know that the media is all around us and sometimes there is little one can do to avoid it but I think that there are certain things that parents can do to shield their children from being hurried by it. One such thing is having common sense and not taking young children to movies that are made for adults!
-Melissa Kyhn
I couldn’t have written that better myself. The uprising of the media has been sky rocketing with the latest technology advancement, giving reason for parents to exchange quality time with their children for TV time. It scares me more than comforts me, because what we are allowing to be broadcast has become questionable, whether or not this is deemed appropriate for children.
ReplyDeleteThe crazy part is THE MEDIA IS FULLY AWARE OF THIS!!! They are fully aware of the problem and instead of addressing the issue at hand, they decide to make a quick buck off of our concerns. Now services are being provided for parents who agree that the content of television may be too much for their children by offering them an option of blocking shows that they deemed inappropriate for children to watch. Was this a way to facilitate more proper viewing for children or to gather more customers? In order to have this right to control what your children watch, you must first be enrolled with the server that provides that service, and secondly you must be willing to pay for their services.
Society has lost its interest in protecting the well being of the children to the point that I’m not sure if providing parental blocks on certain channels or shows is really effective. Commercials alone are dangerous to the welfare of a child. Since when did we allow the green M & M’s to become a sexual figure, to help sell candy? Why is it okay for actors to use inappropriate language on TV? Why are we indirectly promoting sex through the sale of medication? Even with these safety precautions taken to protect our children, wouldn’t we be better off without it?
I’m especially glad that you tackled the case of the little girl and the seductive dress because these are situations we run into daily: the little girl who is wearing a ton of make-up, seductive clothing, and a pair of knee high boots, but doesn’t understand the meaning of her clothing style. Parents, is this really okay? Isn’t this the beginning of learned behavior regarding how to be “sexy”? Learned behavior is the norm for children. They don’t know how to operate or function correctly in this world, so they do this by observing adults’ behavior. If we’re giving them “thumbs-up” to wear these clothes when they’re young, and then give them “thumbs down” when puberty hits, what type of message are we really relaying? That it’s okay to be a mini adult when you’re young and naïve, but when you become a functional adult, this is no longer deemed appropriate. When was it okay to dress our kids up like mini-adults? It becomes mind boggling at one point, because parents will present their children as adults, but when their children make an adult decision like having sex at an early age, parents become frustrated at their decision.
Elkind pointed out a lot of television shows that do promote a hurried child, and as I read this chapter, it reminded me of my own childhood when we used to gather around the TV to watch “Smart Guy.” This was a show that depicted a 9-year old boy who was so smart that he skipped the majority of his primary education and went straight into high school. This was the social pressure that my generation was facing at the time: skipping grades. It had turned into a fad among parents for their child to be skipped a grade, becoming the “trophy” for the parent’s ego. My mom would always comment, “If you push hard enough, you can skip a grade,” but in my heart I never wanted to be seen as that smart. I remember how the TV character felt when the high school issue came up, and he couldn’t relate because he hadn’t even hit puberty yet. So he could never fully grasp the concept of the issues faced in high school, like dances, kissing, dating, drugs and sex because he was young. He just felt left out and alone. This social pressure to understand things beyond their level has rushed our kids to believe that they must know certain things without having the basic foundation of understanding.
Iyare Isibor
Your words were so comforting to read. As I went along I was so excited to know you are my colleague and friend. It was so nice to know how you felt and what you got out of this chapter because I completely agree with you.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the entertainment industry today, it is booming with profit from parents at the expense of children. The developmental rate of children is crucial, and more often than not is overlooked by parents and the entertainment industry. It is just the pure laziness of whoever develops training videos and cartoons, and parents letting their children watch. It is really sad to see children sitting in front of a television watching something inappropriate and not being able to understand what they are watching.
When I was babysitting last summer I watched an 8-year-old girl and a 12-year-old boy. The music that they would want to listen to in my car was really inappropriate. I was listening to the lyrics one day as the little 8-year-old girl was singing along with a song and it was all about sex. I became really upset that she knew the words. I told them from then on they were not listening to that station in my car anymore. It really bothered me that the little girl knew the song from dance class, or at all. Luckily she didn’t know what the content meant, or that would have made me even more worried.
This is my example of a hurried child situation! Parents and others should protect children, as they are the adults in the situation. Children are vulnerable in development, as they don’t quite understand the world, and we, as adults need to be leaders and advocates. Censoring what children watch and listen to is a better way of know what is going on with your child.
Nicole,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the great examples and descriptions in your blog. As you were writing about the different examples that Elkind wrote in his book, I could see myself watching those shows as a kid and kind of feeling the same especially about Doogie. Who wouldn’t want to be a doctor at such a young age? I know I did when I was younger, but I didn’t feel the pressure as a child to have to be something like that because he was. What I remember is that when I watched those shows, I was more interested in what they were wearing and how they did their hair, like DJ I Full House because television people were cool and hip. Not only were they cool, but they looked like children and pre-teens like we did so we could relate to them. Unlike the stars today who may be child actors, but they look almost five years older. If there is any pressure on children to grow up in relation to television, I feel it is because of these child actors that are also having to look and act older then they are.
-Rena Fields